Life is too short to drink bad wine.

The Holidays were lovely and quiet, we're not really deeply affected by the Pandemic since we don't have a lot of family here that we would go to visit. So a good time was had, the Girl went to see family in Longford with her Father and she really loves them, she got several very thoughtful presents.

I'm a bit low energy probably along with most of the population right now. Still walking the road of dealing with the Type 2 diagnosis, over the holidays I was a bit lax so my numbers were a bit high but I still continued losing weight, I'm down from about 106kg at the end of August to 86kg. The new way of eating is at the same time really hard and really easy. I don't think my figures would be where they are if I had followed the Doctor recommended diet, thankfully a close friend has been using a low carb diet to control her diabetes and it's worked for me as well. Dr Jason Fung's books were hugely useful, especially the one about fasting.

On a down note, I'm still having trouble finding someone to fix our underfloor heating at this point I'm losing hope that it will ever be fixed. People just don't want to touch it because it's not a straightforward easy fix.

My asthma has been slowly but steadily disimproving, I switched to a new inhaler a couple of months ago because it was already not great but it's gotten worse than before. My Doctor thinks that it's a postnasal drip aggravating the asthma not the asthma itself that's getting worse. Possibly triggered by allergens. So I'm on sick time for a few days just to get a bit better, the cough is really quite unpleasant and last night was not great. I think the inhaler is starting to help or maybe it's the new nasal spray. They had better because between them they cost €80. Ultimately that doesn't matter since together Kate and my Medication hits the maximum for a family at €114 and we have a med card so we only pay up to that much per month. I think the sick time was very necessary because I spent most of the day spontaneously napping.

The good news is that I took a Covid test just in case and that's negative.

I've been neglecting this diary for a while, time to get back on that bike. It's actually been a pretty good couple of months. I've resolved stress over separating out my tax from my husband's. We shall see how that affects my next paycheque, hopefully, it won't be too awful. On a positive we are getting back into the garden, our potatoes and onions are in the ground and the soil for the cabbages is ready bar compacting it. I still need to properly lay the stones on that part of the bed, they aren't the straightest right now but if that doesn't happen it's not going to prevent the plants from going in the ground. Our seed order from a Dutch Company was severely delayed because of the time that's in it but it finally arrived, we had made the best of the seeds we still had from last year and bought a couple of things that just had to go in the soil. Those will go in the freezer but despite being a little delayed with sowing we should be alright. I need to pick up another heat matt for the polytunnel, should have done that in January but didn't, 20/20. This week we have another bag of topsoil arriving to put on the left-hand bed as it needs to be topped up. We'll chuck a few more bags of compost on top of that and it will be ready for planting.

Individually we are doing ok, Kate has been up and down, I think that the routine of being back in school is going to be good for the next couple of months and she's thinking of getting a Summer Job which I'm encouraging. Ursula is feeling her age but still very active. I'm good though much too sedentary just can't persuade myself that walking is a good idea. I have stopped snacking so much in the evening so that's good.

My SCA Household has been a lifesaver, the human contact has stopped me from turning into a shut-in because as it turns out I'm completely ok with not seeing new faces for months on end. It will be interesting how things will go after vaccines are rolled out appropriately I have to admit to anxiety over having to go into work even on a very limited basis. I'm trying to persuade myself that it will be nice to get back into town a few times each month. Let's hope my boss doesn't press for more than that, she does seem to be open to me hot desking in the fishbowl.

Trinity College has elected a new Provost, the first female one ever, there was a strong field of three women and Prof Linda Doyle who has a background in both STEM and the Arts prevailed. I have high hopes that she will at least make a good attempt at sweeping the centuries old dust out of the corners.

Back to my routine today, getting up wasn't bad, I managed to go to bed at a reasonable hour and didn't have my usual pre return anxiety. We really really need to get that underfloor heating fixed because it's damn cold upstairs, fine to sleep in, I actually prefer it quite cold, but getting out of bed and into a shower is hard at around 12C.

We took it easy this Yule, the tree went up a couple of days before the solstice but we didn't decorate right away which I think contributed to Toaster's not climbing all over it when the ornaments were on. Our butcher got his dates wrong so we had chicken instead of duck for Yule but damn it was an excellent chicken, just perfectly cooked juicy on the inside with crisp flavoursome skin on the outside. Despite financial constraints, we all got amazing presents and everyone was happy, I can't say how much I appreciate the new Garmin, it gives me a freedom to go where I want without the anxiety of getting lost. Kate loves her new stompy boots and Mom's books are over half read already.

I was vaguely planning to get some stuff done in the house but I'm happy to have just rested and played WoW, Shadowlands is amazing, the stuff that's pending will get done soon enough.

Tomorrow is the twelfth day of Christmas so decorations are going to come down. We sorted and passed on stuff we didn't need and we've resolved to fix any of the birds that are broken so that everything is ready to go again next year.

Good riddance to 2020, time to keep our connections strong and build new ones because 2021 isn't going to be easy but we can do it.

I've been making an effort at a regular meditation schedule lately partially to help alleviate the ambient stress that's around right now partially because it just makes me feel good. It's something that people often don't talk about but meditation can be almost addictive. YOu get this amazing feeling of calm and suspension in time and space that you just want to prolong as much as possible. I'm still having a bit of trouble with trying to nod off but that's usually only bad when I really haven't gotten enough sleep. I used to think that I wasn't capable of meditating in the eastern way so I mainly stuck with guided meditation which is something I still practice regularly. But if you start with short sessions of 5 min both Insight Timer and Headspace start you off like this and even if that's all you do it will still be beneficial though I think most people will find that euphoric state to be as seductive as I do.

I'm so happy my bedroom is finished, the curtains are up and it looks like a properly furnished and decorated adults bedroom. It's wark and cozy and not too bright which is what I want from my bedroom. Having shopped around on Amazon for a meditation mat and cushion we decided just to use spare fabric to put one together so my old woollen curtains and the remainder of the woollen quilt batting got put together with a plum coloured wool that is the outer layer. It's thick and soft and will keep my ageing knees warm. Now I need to find some filler for the cushion, traditionally that buckwheat hulls but no idea if I can put my hands on some of those.

It's lovely seeing Irish stores even the small ones, especially the small ones, go online. I think its the only way they are going to survive the pandemic. I wish more stuff was available here in Ireland, that's the bottom line why I go to Amazon.co.uk, that and the fact that Irish prices are still generally higher, we like to tax everyone except big business which we need to stop doing. I'm good with taxes myself but giving corporations a free ride to entice them to come over here is not the way to go. Build small local sustainable businesses, Irish goods for Irish markets. I used to be all about globalisation but I can't see that as the way forward anymore. What's sad is to see how year after year the selection of goods gets smaller and smaller, the variety available less and less, truly the slow emergency I think.

It's been a weird week, as Biden's win got clearer and clearer everyone's shoulders descended a bit. We are still on lockdown but not a strictly as the first one, or perhaps people aren't taking it as seriously. The numbers are mostly going down though not below 200 and they edge up every other day as well. The government astonishingly hasn't been doing detailed contact tracing which they are starting now so we will actually know what's causing the rise in figures and not just speculating. The most promising new vaccine is on the way though not without it's problems, it has to be stored at minus 70 degrees C. We've avoided the infection up to now, fingers crossed we continue to do so.

Kate's school continues to underwhelm with their strange fixation on the uniform, the kids are freezing with all the windows open and they are having lunch outside but gods forbid someone wears a pair of thermals that aren't the school colours. You've got to really wonder about their priorities, it's certainly not the kids. In addition, we are on lockdown and there are no green tights to be had locally so I had to order some good ones on line which will take a couple of weeks, they are just going to have to deal. I can't wait for Kate to be shut of this place.

It's like we are on some demented funride that's no fun at all. Biden has a chance again, Trump is blustering about legal action and calling his devout followers to what basically amounts to civil war. How is this man not in jail?

On a personal note, Mom has been painting the chair, bookshelf, and spray painting the bed sted while I'm working. The oil paint will take till mid next week to cure but I may be able to move into the bedroom again on the weekend unless the smell is too bad. The chaos that had spilt out on the stairs and landing is once again tamed so things aren't nearly so unmoored as they were.

Poor Toaster still has a challenge getting in the cat door, she just doesn't quite have the critical mass yet and she hasn't figured out how to apply what bodyweight she has to get the damn door open.

And the last unconnected titbit is that I've discovered that acorn squash tastes pretty ok, gonna have to find some more recipes.

What an utter disaster of a year, this week will I believe see the end of the reign of the most destructive and morally decrepit President the US has ever seen come to an end, well it will at least be the beginning of the end. But it's really only the start of a very long road. The extreme religious right in the States has been transforming the paradigm of the nation for decades. They've made socialism a dirty word, right has become left, there's a fictitious massacre of the innocence, and immigrants are the new untouchables. For a nation founded on equality and opportunity, for all a place that was the shining goal for so many over the last century that was no mean feat. What is left is a country torn by civil strife, armed to the teeth, a country that never fails to point out its own greatness like an ageing alcoholic footballer whose golden days are far far behind him.

I don't actually believe that it's possible to turn this around to bring the US back to its former glory, a glory that let's not forget wasn't so glorious for the native tribes nor the African slaves and their descendants. Can they become a nation that takes care of its people that's willing to be a member of the family of nations rather than its pater familias? I don't know, it would be a very very hard row to hoe and the nation is deeply divided. My bet, unfortunately, is that it's over and from here on it's going to be a long slow descent punctuated by swings between Democrat and Republican, lets hope that at least there's not another 45.